Surprise!

"Nothing with God is accidental"...
"For I know the plans I have for you..." Jeremiah 29:11

Baby number three is on the way!!

Little one is due February 5th, 2011 -- I am 13 weeks along now.

To say we are surprised, shocked, blindsided...that would be an understatement! This baby obviously wanted to be here -- and let me tell you he or she really beat the odds to get here!! This may not have been OUR plan, but it is HIS plan, and we embrace it! We have had some time to let this soak in a bit, but we surely feel moments of stress as the impending chaos draws near! Yet, we also know that our joy will now be three-fold!!

If there is one thing that our family is experts at, it's dealing with the unexpected. And even though this was a shock (happy surprise), we already love this baby as much as we love our sweet boys.

Let me backtrack a few months...

I remember thinking "This is the first summer in two years that I won't be pregnant". HA! Looks this little one came about around May! For a few weeks, starting in June, I began to feel 'not right'. I just didn't feel like myself, but couldn't pinpoint what was going on. My first thought was - a food allergy. So slowly I began eliminating certain foods from my diet. Of course, nothing changed. Then I had myself convinced that I was really sick, maybe cancer, maybe some weird illness...? It was just an overall feeling. Something was off.

I would consider myself to be a fairly smart gal -- so why didn't "You're pregnant" pop into my mind?? If there was an "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant: 1st Trimester Edition" show, I'd be on it ha! Trust me - I had MANY reasons why pregnancy didn't even occur to me. Firstly, it wasn't even on my radar. We were not planning on having a baby anytime soon, if at all. Jason and I said we'd "talk" about maybe having a baby in FIVE years. Ha! For the time being we were going to focus on our two boys! Secondly, we were dutifully 'being safe' AND I was still getting periods! So when there is no absence of a period, one doesn't really think about pregnancy!!!

So, here I am, thinking I'm dying...or I've contracted some weird illness...or I'm lactose intolerant, need to avoid gluten, etc etc...I did not feel like I did with my past two pregnancies AT ALL! BUT, just to rule it out, I decided to take a pregnancy test. I was SURE that it would be negative. Talk about my Mother's Intuition being WAY OFF!

First test comes up immediately positive and my head began spinning. "Is this a joke?" I yelled out to Jason?! And right away he knew. For a second I thought someone was playing some huge practical joke on me! But the other two positive pregnancy tests told me otherwise.

INSANITY! Pure insanity. Really, all we could do was laugh. When faced with this craziness - what seemed like an impossible situation - we could only laugh. I can't tell you the amount of stress we have been under the past few weeks. We are overwhelmed to say the least. How will we handle three babies? Will this baby be healthy? Will our marriage survive a third child? Will I be able to still be the best mommy I can be to my two boys? Will I have enough love for three?

A few months ago, I actually THREW AWAY baby stuff. Tossed it! Most of the stuff I knew wouldn't last 5 years (when we said we would think about babies again) and some of it I threw away because it would be a reminder that we decided to hold off on having babies...and that we may possibly never have any more at all. (Maybe I jinxed myself by throwing all that stuff eh?!)

I went through my pregnancy with Ty thinking it may very well be my last pregnancy. I was sad through a lot of my pregnancy with him - after we found out he had the same condition as Aidan, and sad because I knew we would not try for another baby after Ty. And now here I am...I don't want to be sad during this pregnancy. I don't want to be scared to go to the doctor. I want to celebrate this baby. We want to embrace this baby, and welcome it into our family. I have been surrounding this little baby with positive thoughts - I won't let fear and sadness be a big part of this experience. With each pregnancy I have learned something, learned how to embrace it or celebrate it. And with this one, more than with my other two, I have learned to have faith and trust that all will happen as it's meant to be.

We know there are no accidents in life, and based on this belief we feel this baby was meant to be a part of our family. We hope and pray for the best for this little one. I know that tons of positive thoughts and prayers have already surrounded this little one!!

We will continue to be a family filled with hope - and we HOPE that everyone who has supported us thus far, will still be by our side as we enter this new phase in our family life. We know this baby will be loved just as much as our boys!!


Hope is not wishful thinking, but a very essential ingredient of life...Hope keeps us dreaming, creating, and overcoming obstacles.